And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Screwed.edu
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
