and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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