I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
