how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
