God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize