Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
