he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize