Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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