Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
