There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
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