either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize