i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
