i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize