HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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