Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
