I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize