I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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