She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
