did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
