and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
