Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
