Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
