okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
