i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
