why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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