I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize