check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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