U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
