i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize