id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
