you win again, gameday.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
