Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize