Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
