Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
