i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
im six kinds of drunk right now
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
