How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
