If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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