Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
