He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
