So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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