careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize