what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
