I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
