I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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