in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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