Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize