Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
