You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
