In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
