guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
stop calling my apartment porn island.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
send nudes
from the living room?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
